Mrs. Bone and Her Bone's Bags

Pop Quiz Hot Shot: 30 Minutes Left of Alone Time, WHAT DO YOU DO?

2012-01-31T17:18:00.000-08:00

Yes, I've seen the movie Speed about a hundred times. But in my defense, I've seen Con-Air much more. hahaha. The kids are with my mom, and Mr. Bone had to stay a little late at work. And you know what I just finished doing? I ate a WARM meal, all by myself while watching Anderson. Ahhh... Hey, I also mowed the lawn and failed at fixing the ghetto-rigged turtle tub in the back yard, so don't think I've just been lazy all day (defensive). I'm tired of tackling the to-do list/folding laundry for now.

Apparently it's been almost 3 months since I last blogged. Not that I haven't felt like it, but I'd rather avoid Bone rolling his eyes at his silly wife who blogs instead of looking for a job (defensive, and possibly paranoid). Coo-koo, coo-koo. I just remember watching an episode of some cop show, and him yelling at his wife during an argument, "Why don't you go blog about it!" Gasp! lol

Life so far has been pretty good. And things are starting to settle down after the holidays, which seem to have lasted from September 1 - January 31. Well, make that February 5th because of the Super Bowl. Can't wait til football season is over. Anyway, we were blessed with a lot of family visits, to and fro. I'm lucky enough to actually love my inlaws. But I'm also autistic enough to go gray when I dont have a schedule to follow. Coo-koo, coo-koo. But now that things are settled, I'm pretending to make time for all of the things that I always fall behind on, by making lots of notes in a planner. And that includes getting back into Bone's Bags.

Christmas time was particularly busy for BB. I had a craft fair in November (The Queen Bee Market), plus I had loads of traffic from Amazon (which was pretty expensive). The Queen Bee Market was pretty disappointing (my second show with them). Although, this time I DID sell enough to cover the entrance fee of $150. Just not much else. It had a centralized check out, which was awesome, and I didn't have to stay at my booth the whole time, but it just didn't pan out. I think that the crowd was probably looking for more childrens items, and jewelry. That being said, I almost sold out of my reusable sandwich/snack bags at each event. Woo-woo. I wont blame the fair, but I think a more diversified group of shoppers might get me a little bit more sales (the fair was indoors, so passers by were limited to hotel guests). And many of the craft booths had incredible displays. Eeek, coming from a craft booth beginner.

Anyway, after the Christmas mayhem and the craft show, I'm ready to get back to creating stuff (it's in my planner, after all). As a matter of fact, I sewed a new kind of produce bag and drawstring bag (for barrel purchases at Henry's, etc) just last night while Bone worked on a presentation for work. I wish I didn't still love to veg on the couch with him so much, otherwise I might actually take off with my bags. THAT'S A LIE. I gladly succomb to the temptation of spending time with my man. We're lucky that we still enjoy spending time with each other after almost 7 years of being together. I've read on line that 7 years is usually when people fall out of love. But I digress. Aaah! the kids are home, gotta go!

Holy Crap - It's Been Too Long!

2011-11-13T23:03:00.000-08:00

Wow, it's almost been 1 year since my last blog. And Corrina is almost 1 year old, so there you go. Not that I was ever very habitual about Mrs. Bone & Her Bone's Bags. But tonight I'm in an unusual position. Mr. Bone is at an Emergency Management Conference for 5 days, and has thereby disrupted my usual routine. Plus, I waited too long in between meals and have a particularly uncomfortable gas bubble swimming inside of me. On the rare occasion that I don't snack/eat regularly, this happens. No, I'm not overweight (on the outside, that is).

Anyhoo - Bone's EMC has come at perfect timing because this Friday & Saturday is The Queen Bee Market . It will be my second QBM, and I'm kinda hopeful/excited. The one in August kinda caught me off guard because I thought it was on Aug. 20th, not Aug. 6th (schedule mix up between mine & Bone's events). Thank God for those reminder emails...! Mind you, I've still procrastinated A LOT. But that's never my problem. The unknown/unexpected is my problem. And since I've already gone to one show, I feel slightly more confident than August's cluster fuck. I exagerrate. It wasn't a "cluster fuck," by my lenient definition of the term. I actually sold stuff, which was more than I expected, BUT I mostly sold reusable sandwich & snack bags, which are not high priced items. Lucky for me, I almost always look on the bright side, I never give up, and I always look for opportunity. So off to my second show, I go! Hopefully I will take pix this time.

As for being at home alone with the girls... I prayed a lot to keep my mind straight. I can be somewhat of a teenager when it comes to being apart from the one I love. A paranoid teenager, at that (mama didn't raise no fool, if you "crazy" women out there know what I mean). But I have a good feeling about Bone, and I rarely allow myself those when it comes to men. And he's in Vegas, to top it all off. My fellow "crazy" women out there are probably thinking I've crossed over into naive-ville, & maybe I have, but to be honest? I'm too run down from the kids to check up on Bone as much as I used to. Fuck it, let Karma have her way with him. Afterall, she IS a BITCH. Woo-woo. But seriously, probably the worst part about him being gone is a tie between missing his body/warmth, and the fact that knowing there's no man in the house. Thinking about stashing a weapon under my bed... Yeah, I watch those crazy Dateline NBC shows, and what? My philosophy is: Stranger things have happened! Same saying goes when it comes to safeguarding the kids.

Anway, this typing has really helped wind me down. And the persistent gas bubble has somewhat run it's course.

What else is going on:

Corrina is finally sleeping through the nite - and Elise ISN'T! What the hell...
Taylor Swift is rocking my world
Corrina looks just like her daddy, and eats just like her mommy
Looking to get a PT job at HR Block - too keep my brain fresh and my degree useful.
Elise is STILL constipated. Screw you Miralax.
I can ALMOST get my CA DL again (DUI @ 21 & 22, forgive me).
My boobs are almost back to normal since weaning Corrina (I hope they just stop shrinkin... wishful...).
Almost found a balance, & waiting for the next curve ball.

Revelations:

Letting Elise watch TV is better than having her watch me lose my patience (/go crazy!). Take a break, woman!
Many other women feel the same way I do on a regular basis, but are too uptight about how a woman/mom should be. Some people need to reach a breaking point before they say what I do. I'm just comfortable with expressing myself on the spot. Sweet relief!
PRODUCTIVE communication is good.
I need Bone as much as I need my kids.
I like being a homemaker
I'm crazy BLESSED. Thank you, Jehovah (no, I'm not a JW).
Forgiveness isn't saying it's "okay" that something happened. It's accepting that it happened, and moving forward. I saw on TV the other day, forgiveness is like letting a prisoner free, and then you realize the prisoner was you.

There's my two sense. Thanks, everyone. Good night!

Welcome Home Turkey Baby!

2010-12-02T16:19:00.000-08:00

Finally - some alone time! Well, almost. Beautiful baby Corrina is sleeping in her crib, and Elise and Ray are out of the house.

As suggested by the title of this post, Corrina Kay Bone was born on Thanksgiving 2010. She weighed in at 6 lbs, 10 oz, and is 20 inches long. Just a little smaller than Elise when she was born. Actually, I keep catching myself calling her Elise. I can't help it. They make the same adorable, sleepy faces when they come off the "teet." hahaha It's funny how much you forget, and how much you remember about your babies. Like, somehow I know that Elise's cry was a little bit more shrill when she was an infant. And when Elise was still hungry, she would bob her head up and down on my chest. Corrina prefers to look for the collar or sleeve of her PJs.

A little funny sidenote: only ONE person - a friend from high school who I haven't spoken to in years, no less - made the connection between my food-loving ass having a baby born on Thanksgiving. Not even I had put two and two together. Hahaha.

Fortunately, Corrina is a tiny, healthy baby. My obgyn gave us a little bit of a scare when she noticed that my belly was small, which resulted in some extra sonograms, which resulted in us finding out that Corrina's measurements (head and femur) were a little small (by about 2 weeks), which resulted in a heightened level of stress for me & Mr. Bone. But all is well. However, she was induced a few days early because during the last sonogram monitoring my obgyn noticed that the amniotic fluid levels had gone from 10.5 on Monday to 3.3 on Wednesday (whatever THAT means, right?). Anyhow, it was reason enough to induce. I just wonder if the loss of fluid meant that Corrina was planning on making an early arrival, anyway, you know? That same day, I had noticed some contractions (which was very unusual). She could've been on her way anyway... But always better to be safe than sorry. PLUS - due to her early delivery, we got to miss out on making so many family trips on Thanksgiving. All the leftovers, and none of the appearances. Priceless. Mr. Bone is still a little worried about her, and says stupid things like, "Have you noticed that this side of her head is a little different than the other?" And then I told him to be happy that she was healthy, already, and to keep his negativity to himself when it comes to my kids. God damnit. I swear, men just do not have what it takes, sometimes. It's very cute how he gets scared when she makes unusual noises, but if he doesn't grow some thicker skin, he's gonna give himself a heart attack before the girls hit their teens. Which, might actually do him some mercy considering what kind of teenagers we were... : )

Well, grandma is about to bring Elise home. My baby, I miss her so much. I wondered if I would be able to love my daughters both the same (yeah, I said it), and now that Miss Corrina is here I see how ridiculous the thought is. They are technically different, but the same in my heart. Whatever that means. And I'm not the type to use "my heart" when describing things, so forgive me if it sounds a little unnatural. hahaha. Anyway, so begins my adventure in parenting childREN. Yes, I know that it's as easy as it gets right now.

As for Bone's Bags, I've had a couple sales a week - or so. And you know what? That's perfect right now.

Trying Out Wholesale

2010-09-22T13:18:00.000-07:00

Hello, hello. As promised, here is a quick run down of what I've done to try to go wholesale. So far no bites... but it's only been a week... I am forever hopeful.

1) Googled eco-friendly stores and supermarkets in the San Diego area. I limited myself to 15 because I knew that I didn't want to pay an arm and a leg for shipping. NO, I DID NOT CALL PRIOR TO MAILING MY WHOLESALE PACKETS - for fear of rejection/humiliation, and armed with the excuse that I don't have time to be calling all these people...

I am slightly experienced with excel and word, so after googling and googling I created a mail merge document for my shipping labels and cover letter.

2) Finalized all of my wholesale docs. Please enjoy the following samples. I kept my discount rates to myself, because someone once said to... Note: the wholesale policies and linesheet are one file.
    - Cover Letter http://bonesbags.com/coverlettersample.pdf
    - Wholesale Policies http://bonesbags.com/linesheetsample.pdf
    - Line Sheet
    - Order Form http://bonesbags.com/orderformsample.pdf

3) Hit up Wal-Mart (yes, the evil and mighty Wal-Mart) for supplies, such as:
    - Green Folders
    - Business Paper (100% recycled)
    - Shipping Labels (100% recycled)
    - Desperately needed ink cartridges

Total supplies cost me about $60, but lets not forget the ink cartridges which we are still using at home. I MIGHT go to a print shop next time if I decide to give it another try. I did NOT research print shop prices. I just like to pretend that going anywhere and doing anything with a 18 month old is a huge hassle. It's the damn car seat, that I hate, I tell you! Oh, AND the cloth diapers. I sure hope using them gets me into heaven... ; ) hahaha

4) Created shipping labels and folder labels, via microsoft word. Sorry, I clearly haven't gone "pro" with my pictures, but all of this is strictly FYI.

5) Put everything in order and shipped to 15 different grocery stores for about $23.00. Note: I used old shipping paper that the movers left with us vs. buying envelopes. I thought it looked pretty and earthy...

Well, I hope that you found something useful. Sorry I couldn't be more detailed, but I'm on borrowed time (i.e. unusually long nap).

What's going on in Mrs. Bone's life, you ask?

1) Getting bigger and bigger. Can't believe Corrina has 2.5 more months of growing to do!

2) Trying to plan a weekend getaway with My Man before Baby Bone #2 gets here.

3) Tacking my "nesting" to-do list, cause mama aint making anymore runs to Home Depot and Walmart after Corrina comes!

4) I have been SLACKING with the cooking lately. Seldom cook, and when I do it's CRAP (imagine fat bastard saying that). But thank God I'm starting to LOOK pregnant, cause now Ray doesn't give me ANY crap. Woo-woo!

5) TRYING to make time for friends.

And what's a post without my personal revelations from the past couple of weeks?

1) Memo to self: Stop being such a martyr.

2) From Ray: Who cares if I feel my belly touch his when we're "intimate." At least my belly is because I'm pregnant, and his is just fat. Yeah, honest to God, that made me feel a lot better. Damn right Ray, damn right.

Alright, that's all I got. Now if I go in there and Elise has wet through her cloth diaper, I have no one to blame but myself. Wish me luck!

Catch Up

2010-08-25T12:41:00.000-07:00

It's been almost a year since I've posted anything : ( I'm bad, I know. And pretty stupid, too, because I thought that I was going to get a peaceful lunch in at the computer desk before Elise woke up - and then I brought out my bag of chips... I have no one to blame since I'm the one who decided to make an office space right outside her bedroom door. But anyway -

Since my last post, PLENTY of things have happened:

1) Graduated from HPU with a degree in Accounting
2) Moved back to S.D.
3) Elise turned 1
4) Got pregnant (it was almost completely planned...)
5) Bought our first home
6) Convinced Mr. Bone I should stay at home
7) PAINTING, YARDWORK, ANTS, & ERRANDS

Oh yeah...

8) Trying to sell/make bags

But do I have anything useful to write, you ask? Let me ponder that, while I get distracted by my last bite of a PB & J and wonder why I didn't make 2. No, it's not just cause I'm pregnant. This is how I usually am with food. Anyway - I guess that I will address topic #8 on my long list of accomplishments (LOL), since I think that most of my followers are fellow crafters.

My big lesson learned this year has been that Farmer's Markets are A LOT OF WORK and not necessarily for everyone - but that doesn't mean that you're a failure.

Factors that impacted my "failure" at the San Diego Gaslamp Farmer's Market:

Location, Hours, and People Traffic - This seems to have EVERYTHING to do with success at an FM. With my experience, and my products, I feel that the Gaslamp Farmer's Market in San Diego was just not my venue. It was small (20 vendors), the hours were short (9am - 1pm), and it also seemed to be really subjective to the local events in Downtown San Diego (e.g. Padres games, Comic - Com, Holidays). And this is a consensus based on other vendor opinions, too - not just my desperate attempt to make excuses for myself/my bags. Note: That's not to say that all the vendors crapped out while I was there (maybe I'm a jinx?). The man who takes pix of San Diego and frames them seems to be doing well... Can't remember his website...

However, I was directed towards other FMs that might do me good - sadly, all of them have Reusable Bag Vendors already OR are during the week (that's a no-go, since I already have a full-time job that I'm dedicated to. i.e. Elise). And the vendors, and organizer, Dave, were all really nice and friendly. They seemed like a family, really. I coulda gotten into that. But at $25 a show, and only selling 2 - 4 bags a SUNDAY, I couldn't justify making any more appearances. Plus, coming home and telling Ray of how few bags I sold is torture. My ansy man like results, and he likes them yesterday!

But after some serious "soul searching" (LOL) I AM happy that I participated in the FMs. I can now say that I've tried 'em, and they're just not for Bone's Bags. Which is good, because they're a lot of work... PHEW. But what else can I do? I sure as hell aint quitting. I only quit things that I DON'T like to do.

Now I'm really pushing wholesaling. Well, "pushing" meaning that I've created a linesheet/order form/guidelines that I still need to print. But I'm closer than I've ever been before! hahaha By the way, I WILL make my forms available on my blog once I can write up the full story.

Anyhoo - That's my life and Bone's Bags in a nutshell. Personal Revelations that I've had this year:

1) It's okay if the house doesn't look good when Ray gets home. I DO bust my ass all day, whether it shows or not.
2) Sprinkler systems SUCK
3) Where the hell did my sex drive go? I thought I would be a sex-kitten forever...
4) I don't care about my cellulite because Holly Madison has it all over her legs and ass, and STILL charges $100 a ticket to see her show. God bless her for that.
5) This old grey mare, she aint what she used to be. Aint what she used to be.

That concludes my catch up. Take it easy!

Free Craft Fairs are a NO-NO

2009-11-10T14:41:00.001-08:00

So I’ve been a big baby as far as taking the steps needed to put myself out there (e.g. craft fairs and wholesaling). I don’t take any “plunges,” per se. Rather, I dip my toe in and out of the water, if you get my drift. Actually, that’s how I do most things – except for eating and drinking, of course. Well I’m beginning to see the error of my pussy-footing ways (sorry if “pussy-footing” offends you, but there’s no other way to say it). I’m talking about craft fairs. Low budget craft fairs.

My first event was a yard sale/craft fair, and because everyone and their mom were selling their entire personal belongings for 25 cents, I really feel that it was the wrong arena for my bags. That’s my excuse for my low sales, anyway. Well, it was only $20, for 4 hours, and I was just happy to get so many compliments (accompanied by very FEW sales). The combination of handing out my business cards and people telling me that my bags were “so cute” was just enough to keep me hanging on by a thread. Yes, I was left hanging on by a thread – very much like Gordy, when the occasional acknowledgement keeps her thinking that maybe we want to play with her. Well, after conquering breastfeeding, no little craft fair was going to bring me to tears (I think Ray was more upset about it than I was). I was just paying my dues, right?

Well, I had my second fair this Saturday and Sunday. It was hosted by Hawaii Self Storage in Mililani. I was pretty excited about this fair because it was indoors – meaning A/C and NO WINDS. Woo! Plus, it was free. Here’s the trick that I never new – there’s a damn good reason why other fairs were charging $100+ to be there as a vendor. People actually show up to those fairs. No, the fair at the storage place wasn’t a COMPLETE ghost-town, but most of the people that were walking around were other vendors or their families. I got to chat with other vendors there, and not surprisingly, most of my neighbors were newbies, too. Because all the pros know better than to go to free craft fairs.

Despite Saturday’s turn out, I was determined to show up on Sunday. In Ray’s words, “Mama didn’t raise no quitter.” He said that mostly out of support, but you could tell that right after the words left his mouth he became full of bitterness. My poor man likes instant gratification (who doesn’t), and while I don’ t think he was angered by me, for some reason something crawled up his ass and he started to clean the house because he was “tired of things looking like a mess” (passive aggression). Patience my sweet, ‘tis the nature of the beast… If only I was so delicate. After asking him what was up his ass, he slowly came back down to Earth and took us to CPK.

Anyhoo – I went on Sunday, thinking that surely, I would be the only fool to show up. But I wasn’t. Almost all the vendors had returned, and they were all as friendly as ever. To pass the time, I thought that I would throw a raffle. My plan was to give out 4 shopping bags to the winner, and then email all of the other contestants that they hadn’t won, but for participating I would give them a 10% discount on their next purchase at www.bonesbags.com. Crafty, aye? I’ll let you know how that turns out... ‘Til then: I caution you against the free craft fairs. I’m trying to convince myself to skip the $25 fair this weekend… Wish me luck…

Making Bonesbags.com

2009-09-24T14:24:00.000-07:00

I'm what you might consider an "intermediate" computer user. I know my Microsoft Word, Excel, Outlook, and I can surf the web just fine. And, I can more or less find my way through any sort of menu. But I would never consider myself savvy in the ways of the tech world. Nonetheless, I decided that I would make my own website to sell my bags from. Savvy? No. Do it yourself-er? Yes. So here's my adventure in making bonesbags.com. Mind you, there are probably better ways of getting the same thing done. But this is the short and sweet version of how I did it, and by no means a step-by-step of how to get your site looking the way you want, because Lord knows I still have A LOT to learn.

1. Came up with a website address. Duh, same as my DBA: Bone's Bags. Hence, http://www.bonesbags.com/. Now, keep in mind, I had already googled "Bone's Bags" prior to registering my name in the state of HI, and knew that the business name was pretty safe and unique.

2. Made sure that the web address was available. I typed in bonesbags.com in the search bar of my browswer. No problem. What I didn't do - google similar addresses. For example, there is a bonebags.com. Not the end of the world, but an obvious oversight as someone might forget my little "s" and get confused when they see bags in the shape of a bones pop on their screen. Not exactly my style...

3. Purchased my website name AND subscribed to a hosting service. I found Act Now Domains from another article on the web. Here, I purchased my website address (impulse buy)and I got a nice set of services that allow me to upload changes to my site, get email (i.e. viena.bone@ bonesbags.com), and check various reports on how many times my website has been viewed. Very nice. And I can also do other things like upload files to my site through the FTP manager (No, I don't know what that means, exactly). For example, I can upload my logo file to my website so that I can access the image from other computers. The file would be located like: www.bonesbags.com/xxx.jpg. Something like that. I really only use a few menu options, since my computer skills are limited, but I think I'm getting my money's worth for $8.95 a month.

4. Made a website. Now, I'm sure that there are bigger and better website building programs out there, but I tested and purchased Ewisoft. It's fairly easy to use for the beginner. I paid roughly $80 for the basic website building program and the e-commerce features. The program makes it very easy to upload your website (once you've entered the proper address/info), and it also works very well with paypal. I'm not sure if those features are available with other programs, but I was happy to see that Ewisoft took care of that for me. Having said all that, I DO have my problems with it. Like, the service reps don't seem to work on the weekends. And there seem to be a few bugs,- but that could just be my lack of skill talking. Also, I wish that I could put pictures anywhere that I want without them moving all of my other pictures/paragraphs. I have yet to master the art. However, Ewisoft does have a fairly easy to follow help menu. Something I should have used before I started using the program : )

ATTENTION ETSY SELLERS: Consider making your own website for the purposes of branding and getting more info/pix across to your potential customers. If I had to do it all over again, rather than burdening myself with all of the ecommerce stuff on my site, I think I would probably just link http://www.bonesbags.com/ to my etsy shop. It would have been very easy.

1) Make the "Shop" page
2) Hyperlink the Shop page to bonesbags.etsy.com.

ALSO, I haven't tried it out, because I have my own ecommerce set up, but having your own website might make it easier to set up advertising with amazon.com. Check out their Seller Central.

Done. Oh well, you live and you learn.

Anyhoo, I hope that someone can appreciate the short and sweet version of it all. I was once overwhelmed by all my options, but my impulse purchases (act now, ewisoft, etc.) have all helped me learn and get through the greuling art of making a website. Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed!

Happy Anniversary Bone's Bags

2009-09-14T12:57:00.000-07:00

Dang, it's already been one year. And I can't say that there is a ton to show for it. Let's just say, the first 1o months I chose to have an "if you build it, they will come" sort of attitude. Promotion? What's that? Now every morning I ache to hop on the Etsy forums, hoping to bring people to my shop, and find some way to direct some traffic towards bonesbags.com.

I still remember the greuling day I decided to make my first bag. It had been years since I'd actually used a sewing machine, and I was - to say the very least - intimidated. Why did it take me 4 hours+ to complete my first "prototype?" Oh, maybe it was because I refused to go out and buy an appropriate needle for sewing canvas. Or maybe I should've appreciated the signs that something was going terribly wrong with my bobbin. Either way, I'm a stronger woman for that day. And considering I was 3 months pregnant, I'm surprised my sewing machine lived to see another day. But now, me and my sewing machine are one. My spider senses tingle when something is about to go awry. Together, we've banded to make this world a better place one reusable bag at a time.

I mostly sell my bags through Etsy.com. Probaby close to 50 units in 9 sales - not including family or friends. I say I wont sell to them, but my husbands step-mom has put me to work in the past few months! I never knew that I would be handpainting so many "I heart trees!"And while reusable canvas bags will always have my heart, reusable produce bags are my new and favorite thing.

So far this experience has been great. Some things that I've learned:
- givin' it 60% isn't going to cut it.
- google ads do not pay off for the lil' guy
- forums are great resources and promoting tools
- just because you build it doesn't mean they will come.
- heartomatic at craftcult.com RULES
- business cards RULE
- it is against the law to sell my items without care labels!
- Ray can be more supportive than I thought ; 0
- I love canvas

He Declared September Second as Sex Day

2009-09-03T11:41:00.000-07:00

I sometimes tell my hubby that we are like Al and Peggy Bundy. He doesn't sell shoes, and I don't run around in tights, but I do chase him for sex. For some reason, I was always under the impression that sex was on the top of the to-do list for most men. 'Tis not the case in our house. Damn you, disillusionment! And somehow I've become the sex fiend out of habit, or to compensate - I'm not sure anymore.

Anyhoo, yesterday, September Second: I'm debating the late afternoon nap with Elise, and in walks Ray. It's dark in the room so I'm not quite sure what I see, but I think it's a bouquet of flowers. First thought in my head: Hmm, maybe he did something good at work. I'm invisioning an office party...cupcakes maybe... Where are the cupcakes? I ask, "What are those?" He says, "For you." I notice there's a card inside. I'm thinking: yeah right, mother fucker, when I open that card it's going to have the signatures of all the staff in your office. HAHAHA. Low and behold, in CURSIVE, the envelope says "To my beautiful wife." What the fuuuuck...

I start thinking, what day is it? Wait a minute... I can figure this out... September... 2nd. That's nothing to either one of us. Wait. He brought soda (my desperate needed caffeine fix), a bottle of wine, and he wants to order pizza? Wait a God damn minute... What is going on here...? Birthdays? What am I missing?! He says, "It's sex day." September second: sex day. Alliteration is my friend. Makes sense to me. I joke, "I guess with all this, it means I'm on top, right?" Hahaha.

I will spare you the Larry Flint version of our evening - for, to tell you would surely set your crotch on fire. But I would like to note, the beauty in this tale is that where most men would go this far because they have no other means to getting laid, my hubby did all this knowing that I would've dropped my pants at "hello."

Weekend Gist

2009-08-30T14:25:00.000-07:00

The highlight of my weekend: the Turkey Bacon Guacamole sandwich from Quizno's that I just ate. Not because it was so good, but because I didn't have to make it. Woo-hoo. Elise is almost ready to put down to bed. I can hear her making her Slingblade noises. Apparently those grunts are normal. Anyhoo, Mr. Bone has been slaving over home work all weekend. I feel slightly guilty that he has such a heavy load - and me not so much - but I've been paying my dues since 2002. Plus, he gets to sleep through the night. There. Now I feel better.

All in all, I feel accomlished this weekend. Even though I haven't started my homework that's due in 10 hours... I FINALLY went in for the CT scan (the LAST lab/test that needs to be run before I donate my kidney to Ana). The tech was funny. I'm watchin' him the entire time as he preps my arm for the IV, and then I continue watching as he puts it in. He asks, "Are you a sadist, or something?" Finally, someone with the balls to ask me! Haha. No, I just have to watch what's coming to me. I don't know why. Looking away might be better, but I'll never know because the anticipation of the needle penetrating my skin would be unbearable. Sidenote: the contrast that goes through your body for the CT scan makes you feel like you're peeing your pants.

Other mentionable accomlishments this weekend:

- Took Elise to the beach by myself - even set up the tent

- Took a picture with my eyes open!